tch-tch-changes

Been a lotta change around here. Queers can tie the knot (even trekkies!)...get your appointment now (and remember to VOTE in the upcoming and November elections). In case you think McCain's alright, and you've been distracted by the Clinton-Obama sideshow, take a gander at why it's more important than ever that a Dem wins this year! (Not to mention peachy's *excellent* point that we don't want a Repub selecting the next Supreme Court nominee!)
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On mahwhege: So much to say, and so many feelings getting in the way. First...hurray! Queers can get hitched (again) in sf (at least till November). And second, yes, there are many many other major civil rights issues out there that need to be addressed. No, i'm not sure i'll ever get married again (i'm a romantic...but, well, let's just say, i'm certainly not expecting wedding bells before the nov election). But it is wonderful to see the joy in so many of my friends (many who are married already and/or in committed long-term relationships). happiness is a good thing.
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On werk: So, my buddy at work responded to a question of mine, and it gave me some interesting stuff to chew on. It's true that I'm in a dead-end job, with not much opportunity for growth. It wasn't ever a problem, since I was here for the people, and pizzawhirled treated me pretty alright. But the latest round of layoffs and the loss of good people have been particularly hard to take (they're never easy). And all signs are pointing toward change. Which is a good thing, as it takes a lotta signs before I buck the forces of inertia and get moving.

The bad thing is, all this change, combined with other rudimentary external forces (like over-caffeination), has elevated my already-elevated anxiety levels. Stress runs through me, leaving me wound rather tightly--I had a PT tell me once that I was basically constantly doing anaerobic exercises. Guess it's good for my muscle tone (gotta figure out a way to re-route the tension to work on my abs). So now I'm working on letting go (or if I can't let go, faking it till I make it--I am relaxed, dammit!). There's a lot of impending doom out there, but there's only so much I can do about it. And back to Ji's response, the lesson I'm working on this week is to sit with what I'm doing. If I'm drawing some kooky thing for someone, I'll draw it and move on. The response isn't the point. And maybe I don't need to push so hard on recalcitrant advertisers. If they don't care about the quality of their own ads, why should I feel any differently?

Not sure if any of that made sense, but I'm back at meditating (averaging about 8 minutes at a time) and Kajukenbo has been good for me. Not sure what it is, but I used to hate sparring, and for some reason, now it makes me smile. I was running late yesterday, so I only caught about 15 minutes of sparring (during which I was mainly a punching bag for my upper belt big sisters), but I was smiling like a fool the whole time.

Oh, and an aside. Sorry about the inconsistent capitalization and extra-spazzy-ness. I'm combining bits from a coupla jotted down drafts, so it's a bit spotty. I'll come back and whittle it down if/when I can.
Labels: change, civil rights, queer rights, vote 2008

:: ewee 4:14:00 PM [+] :: 0 comments ::
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